I used to be able to retreat into glorious ignorance whenever someone complained about an ignorant dude in their lives, who didn’t seem to understand someone else’s sexuality/preferences/race/etc. and had somehow weaponized that lack of understanding into something that’s able to ruin somebody’s whole day at a hundred yards.
When told one of those stories, I would pretend it was obvious hyperbole or something, because I was trying to make myself feel better about the world in which I live.
I can’t do that anymore, because a guy I knew in college has grown up to be the Platonic ideal of that guy, offended by your offense, confused by his own lack of understanding, possessed of the same human empathy as one would expect to find in the average hammerhead shark.
He could be transplanted into every anecdote of its sort without significant alteration: asking ignorant questions of black people, acting as if lesbian couples are there for his vicarious enjoyment, dismissing transgender activities as an attempt to get into the other sex’s washrooms, discussing male homosexuality as if it begins and ends with the vaunted butt stuff, you name it.
I am unsure as to how to deal with this, but I suspect one day I am going to have to figure out how to give him a vasectomy without his noticing.