The way I see it, if you’re going to cast Michael B. Jordan as the Human Torch, there are three ways to go with it:
1) cast a white woman as Sue and include a handwave at some point that one of them is adopted
2) cast a white woman as Sue, include no such handwave, and in fact make absolutely no reference to it whatsoever in order to drive people up the wall (the “because fuck you, that’s why” justification)
3) cast a black woman as Sue (Kerry Washington? she’s supposed to be a good six, seven years older than Johnny)
If 3) is what they go with, I would hope there is a scene near the end of the film where somebody, probably Ben, mentions offhandedly that Sue is black, and Reed stops for a second and looks vaguely confused, then shrugs and goes about his day, because if there is any character in all of fiction who could get away with marrying a woman without noticing that her ethnicity differs from his own, it is Reed Richards.
Okay, new head-canon.
In need of greater flexibility and a steadier paycheck, Chun-Li retired from Interpol and sought behind-the-scenes work in similar fields, the better to fund her orphanage. Unfortunately, the remnants of Bison’s organization are still out there and some of them have a grudge, so to keep the children safe, she’s assumed a new identity.
About twenty-five years later, she’s become an agent of SHIELD and is ostensibly a helicopter pilot.
Her cover ID is “Melinda May.”
Sometimes I hate my own brain.
The joke, as far as I understand it, is “sex pollen”: an all-purpose excuse for two characters in fanfiction to bang despite the fact that they probably never would under any other circumstances. Maybe it is magic pollen or science pollen or there is a fairy named Pollen sprinkling dust everywhere but the point is that it makes people bang those they would not ordinarily bang. It is for fanfiction people to do fanfiction things with.
I saw someone talking about it once, chuckled at its blatant gives-a-fucklessness, went on with life. No big.
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Thinking out loud about it:
Both Victoria Hand and Jennifer Kale got killed in the same couple of issues of New Avengers by the same guy screwing around with possession and the astral plane, which was a bullshit move since it took two of the vanishingly small population of Marvel Universe bisexuals off the board at once, but it’s Bendis and he has a habit of doing remarkably reversible deaths.
It wouldn’t be hard to do a story where Kale, at least, has been bombing around the astral plane since then trying to get her act together. Along the way she gathers up what’s left of Victoria and the two of them end up needing to get Strange or Emma or someone’s attention. Clone them new bodies from conveniently-available blood/tissue samples that are still in storage at SHIELD and ARMOR and there you have it.
Then, of course, the part of my brain that is never more than ten minutes away from writing porn suggests that two bisexual women together in an adverse situation would probably at least have a fling, the same way that any two people with compatible orientations in an adverse situation might do.
Mostly it’d be worth it for the scene when Dr. Strange walks into the lab to make sure everything’s going okay with the re-bodying procedure and comes back out thirty seconds later and stands protectively in front of the locked door.
Logan: Everything all right in there?
Strange: Yes! Yes. The situation appears to have, um, resolved itself.
Logan: [looks confused, sniffs] Oh. Got it.
Strange: I had no idea that Jennifer was—
Logan: [big evil grin]
Wow, fuck playing Horde.
I can’t seem to get through a single zone after the Northern Barrens without committing a war crime.
I have to say that Amy Davidson’s essay was the first thing I read today about the rescue of Amanda Berry and Gina DeJesus, and it’s been influencing my thinking on the subject, above and beyond the interview that Charles Ramsey did.
It’s a funny interview, mostly because Ramsey’s handling himself very well, better than I would under the circumstances (especially in the 911 call: “She needs everything.”), but I think Davidson nailed it in her final paragraph: if there’s one thing to remember him for, it’s not the interview. It’s that he got involved when a lot of people wouldn’t have. The rest of it doesn’t matter.
I’m surprised Dead Island hasn’t caught on with certain audiences more than it has.
Granted, it’s buggy, violent, and not balanced for single-player at all (although Riptide is much better about it than the first game, it’s still full of a lot of cheap deaths if you’re playing alone), but for whatever reason, the game is a zombie apocalypse first and a story about the evils of the patriarchy second.
The original cast is half female, three-fourths POCs, and the ladies are the main damage dealers, with the black guy as the unkillable damage sponge. With Purna, her backstory is that she tried really hard to be a cop for twelve years before her superiors simply made it impossible for her to do her job anymore (and then she lost her temper on a suspect); with Xian, she’s been stuck into a dead-end position on a backwater island resort because her superiors simply can’t think of anything better for her to do.
I’ll grant that Purna goes for long stretches of time while deliberately attempting to be as unlikable and angry as possible, although that’s given some small amount of plot justification in the second game. That said, she’s a half-black, half-Australian Aborigine woman who’s the protagonist of a high-profile game, and I swear to God the game at least broadly hints she’s got a thing for Xian. I’m genuinely surprised that both the femmeslash fans and the social justice/feminist gamer crowd haven’t latched onto her (she has a skill that gives her +15% damage against male opponents! she’s misandry, the character!), because aside from the mild issue of the whole game being written somewhat badly, she seems to be everything that a lot of people are asking for out of video game protagonists.
What I’m saying, really, is that Dead Island deserves a lot more fanwork than it gets and that surprises me.
I wonder if anyone’s ever written the scene where Deathstroke the Terminator, former military man and current mercenary, goes drinking with a bunch of the guys he used to serve with and is asked repeatedly what part of his training convinced him that wearing blue and orange chain mail and fighting dudes with a sword and quarterstaff were at all congruous with what he was taught as a new recruit.
The problem with Tumblr Savior is that it does not recognize “pictures of Chris Redfield in dishabille with a dong so large that were he to go even to half-mast he would instantly die of hypovolemic shock” as a valid block
I’m like “hey what’s going on in the #resident evil tag” and then I have to ignore six more blogs with names involving the word “bara” or “yaoi”
